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Citizens Notice
http://uzaclan.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=1598		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  {uZa}mr. brightside [ Sun Jul 04, 2010 12:13 am ]
Post subject:  Citizens Notice
Email I got. Contains a some language, fyi.

NOTICE TO ALL CITIZENS

> Due to the current financial situation
> caused by the slowdown in the economy,
> Congress has decided to implement a scheme to put
> workers of 50 years of age and above on early retirement,
> thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.
>
> This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).
>
>
> Persons selected to be RAPED
> can apply to Congress to be considered for the
> SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).
>
> Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED
> will be reviewed under the
> SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).
>
> A person may be RAPED once,
> SHAFTED twice and
> SCREWED as many times
> as Congress deems appropriate.
>
> Persons who have been RAPED could get
> AIDS (Additional Income for Dependants & Spouse)
> or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel’s Early Severance).
>
> Obviously, persons who have
> AIDS or HERPES
> will not be
> SHAFTED or SCREWED
> any further by Congress.
>
> However, persons who are not
> RAPED and are staying on,
> will receive as much
> SHIT (Special High Intensity Training)
> as possible.
>
> Congress has always prided themselves on
> the amount of SHIT
> they give our citizens.
>
> Should you feel that you do not receive enough
> SHIT,
> please bring this to the attention of
> your Congressman or Congresswoman,
> who have been trained to give you all the
> SHIT you can handle.
>
> Sincerely yours,
> The committee for the
> ECONOMIC VALUE OF INDIVIDUAL LIVES (EVIL).
>
> P.S.
> Due to the most recent budget cuts
> and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil,
> as well as current market conditions,
> the LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL
> has been turned off.
Author:  {uZa}Underdog [ Tue Jul 06, 2010 7:57 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Citizens Notice
:shock: Hey that includes me! :shock: HaHaHa... good one Brightside. :D
Author:  {uZa}MrPow [ Tue Jul 06, 2010 12:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Citizens Notice
:roll: Come on, that one is so old, I think it's in the Bible. :lol: LOL
Author:  {uZa}mr. brightside [ Tue Jul 06, 2010 2:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Citizens Notice
The only thing older is that joke. :D
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