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For those with kids

 
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{uZa}Meethos
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 6:17 pm    Post subject: For those with kids Reply with quote

BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
_____________________________________________________
Preparing for the Birth! :
1s t baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.
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The Layette:
1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
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Worries:
1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.
______________________________________________________
Pacifier:
1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
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Diapering:
1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain
about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
_______________________________________________________
Activities:
1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing,
Baby Zoo, Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.
_____________________________________________ _________
Going Out:
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.
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At Home:
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing,
poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children .
______________________________________________________
Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!




Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing
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<WG>Pitthunter
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 9:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOL Meethos - how true... Laughing
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{uZa} Glockster
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 9:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Were you writing this for me and my family? Three - 3 and under!!!! Shocked
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{uZa} Glockster
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<WG>Pitthunter
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 8:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow Glock Shocked now I don't feel so bad with a 3 and 6 year old.
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{uZa}Scorpius
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 10:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing
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MR GR1MM
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 5:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How true. Laughing
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{uZa}Lonesome Eagle
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 5:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

All exactly true... Wink

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{uZa}Col. Hogan
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2007 3:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

3 & under, 3-6, WOW. Both mine are out high school already. Great post Meethos. Laughing Laughing
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{uZa}Meethos
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2007 3:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Glock you were the first one that I though of. Shocked





Laughing Laughing
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{uZa}Lasherman
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2007 9:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

HA! 6, 4, 2, and 3 months!!!I GOT YA'LL BEAT!!

Oh shit, maybe that has something to do with my drinking problem....nahhh.
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Shadow
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 9:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Smile Very Happy Laughing Great Post and all of it is true. Bless all you parents with young children.
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{uZa}D.O.A.
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 1:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

have you been talking with my wife?
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