Just for laughs!

Posted: Thu Mar 27, 2008 12:00 pm Post subject: Just for laughs!

A GOOD BELLY LAUGH FOR THE DAY!!

SMART ANSWER #6 -- It was mealtime during a flight

on Hooters Airline. 'Would you like dinner?' the flight

attendant asked John, seated in front.

'What are my choices?' John asked. 'Yes or no,' she replied.

SMART ANSWER #5 -- A flight attendant was stationed

at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached,

she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench

coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said,

' Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.'

SMART ANSWER #4 -- A lady was picking through the

frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn't find one

big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, 'Do these

turkeys get any bigger?' The stock boy replied, 'No ma'am,

they're dead.'

SMART ANSWER #3 -- The cop got out of his car and the

kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window.

'I've been waiting for you all day, ' the cop said. The kid replied,

'Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.' When the cop finally

stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

SMART ANSWER #2 -- A truck driver was driving along

on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, 'Low Bridge Ahead.

' Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he

gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles.

Finally a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and

walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says,

'Got stuck, huh?' The truck driver says, 'No, I was delivering

this bridge and ran out of gas.'

SMART ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2007

A blonde goes to the post office to buy stamps for her Christmas

cards. She says to the clerk, 'May I have 50 Christmas stamps?'

The clerk says, 'What denomination?' The blonde says, 'God

help us. Has it come to this? Well, then, give me 6 Catholic,

12 Presbyterian, 10 Lutheran and 22 Baptists.'

Bonus extra:

A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror.

She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband,

'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay

me a compliment.' The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn

near perfect.'

He never heard the shot...

GOLF BALLS

A man got on a bus with both of his front pockets

full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde.

The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging

pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her, he

said, 'It's golf balls.' Nevertheless, the blonde continued

to look at him for a very long time, thinking about what he

had said. After several minutes, not being able to contain

her curiosity any longer, she asked, 'I’m sorry…Does it hurt

as much as tennis elbow?'
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Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage!