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Wow! 2006 was when I first posted this. Time sure flies when you're having fun. Some of the names you'll see don't show up much anymore, but at the time they were pretty regular. I was not yet a member, but had been welcomed as a regular and treated as if I had been their friend for years. Dupont even sent me a video card he no longer needed, to help me with my video lag problems (which I reference in the poem). I hope you enjoy.
Twas The Night Before Christmas
(A story about uZa)
by Floyd Bayne
(fcbcynic)
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Gomer was searching for his backup mouse.
Ventrilo was on and he anxiously waited,
In hopes that his loneliness would soon be abated.
Bullet-Sponge was yelling, he was shot in the head,
As Dellis mocked him for being dead.
And Dupont at his desk was shaking his head,
As Dellis’ humor gave him reason for dread.
When on server number 3 there arose such a noise,
He knew right away that it must be the boys.
He turned up his speakers, the better to hear,
As the player’s antics became quite clear.
Pooning and nading were the ways of the lads,
There was even a mod to kick guys in the nads.
When who to the players’ joy did appear?
Baker Girl, and they began to leer.
She deftly avoided the wolf-like flirting,
And on many lads she put quite a hurting.
It wouldn’t be long before Gomer would say,
Let’s move to another room to chat, right away.
He was back soon enough, but our minds they did wander,
What did they talk about we began to ponder.
But enough of that stuff, it was back to the game,
Yet again Cynic’s score was really quite lame.
Lonesome Eagle alighted, we were all most impressed,
He wasted no time in calling to the rest.
Go Chaos, go Spinner and Glockster and Bogey,
You can beat Cynic, he’s just an old fogy.
And Scorpius, and Canada, even Exodus and Hogan,
Pooning is encouraged, we must live up to our slogan.
As BodyBagFiller did his job very well,
Cleaning up the mess and getting rid of the smell.
Sly-ty and CrazySpinner, those youthful lads,
Remind many that we’re old enough to be their dads.
And EliteSoldier tells us, whenever he plays,
That his FPS leaves him in a daze.
Mr.Grimm came along to spread his good cheer,
DeathByMunky swung by, it was really most queer.
A Munky with a gun, we were all perplexed,
As he pooned Cynic again it left him quite vexed.
THIS LAG, THIS LAG screamed Cynic quite distraught,
I fear my playing is going for naught.
When along came Dupont, at Gomer’s urging,
To help fix the problem without any splurging.
Taken aback by such kindness was he,
That he attempted to thank the powers that be.
Such friends as these, who would have guessed,
I must confess I feel very blessed.
A new video card, with bated breath I awaited,
My appetite for mayhem it soon would be sated.
With the big day approaching I tried to stay calm,
This aching I feel would soon have its balm.
In closing I would ask that you all pay heed,
You should all be thankful when done a good deed.
With the new friends I have made through the uZa Clan,
I consider myself a most fortunate man.
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL MY NEW FRIENDS!
_________________ Malo periculosam libertatem quam quietum servitium! I prefer liberty with danger to peace with slavery! 
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